I think it's odd for a 16 year old to have a diary, it's kind of childish to me. But my parents bought it for me to keep track of what I'm doing. By the way, I'm Sarah. I moved to Montana from New York. But I don't like it here. I don't think the kids like me either. They bully me and call me rude names. It's almost Summer though. School will be out and I get to visit my old friends. I miss them a lot. Anyway,it's late, I should get to bed.
The kids at my school keep calling me fat, ugly, and that I should have never came here. I'm starting to believe them. My parents keep saying that it's not true, and that I should ignore them. But it's easier said then done,you know? Anyway I should go.
Today is the first say of Summer! Everyone is talking about this party. The popular girls asked if I could join, I couldn't believe it! They asked me! Maybe I'm becoming popular,maybe I'll finally have friends here. I can't wait to go tonight.
They tricked me... They pretended to like me. We played Truth Or Dare and I had to say a lot of embarrassing stuff, and they caught it on tape. The next day they showed it to the whole school. It was so embarrassing. I tried defending myself. They just beat me up. All the way to where I was bleeding and it was hard to breath. I got knocked out and I woke up in the hospital, with my parents by my side. I still felt weak and I was in pain but smiled at them. I'm getting sleepy again. I should stop writing...
Today I woke up and my parents were crying. At my bed. I didn't understand why. I asked why and they kept crying. "Why are you crying?!" I asked again with a firm tone this time. But they kept crying. It was horrible to see. I wanted them to stop. I still hear there crying sometimes. It's a painful sound to hear.
My parents went home today. I got in the backseat of our car and they drove home. My mom looked bad. She obviously was crying. I felt so bad. I kept thinking I did something. That I hurt them. We passed the house of the kids that beat me up. They looked at my parents car and looked... guilty. I didn't understand what was going on. I needed to find out.
To day was the last day of school! I'm so happy! I'll be able to see my friends and go back to Montana! But, people are still acting strange around my parents,and they give them flowers and cards, and they always say 'I'm sorry for your lost'. I don't understand what they mean. No one died. People only say that when someone dies...
Have you ever felt like you were invisible? Like no one could see you, and that you were separated from the whole world? Everyone going about there daily routine and it was like no one saw you. Well,I have. I try talking to my parents and they ignore me. My parents sell my stuff when I beg them not too. I loved my things. But all that's left now in my room is..nothing..
I haven't wrote in this in awhile and I need too. So many things have happened to me. My mother is pregnant with another baby, my desk at school is filled in so I don't have anywhere to sit. My room is filled with baby stuff. I keep yelling at my parents "What's going on?!" "Why did you replace me?!" and they still ignore me. I'm getting very angry now. I want answers,and I'm not getting anything.
I went inside my old room. I hated the new baby stuff. I hated everything because nothing was listening to me. Everything ignored me. Like I was invisible! The rage took over me and I threw something across the room. My parents ran into my room and they looked, well they looked like a lot of things. They looked scared, surprised, happy. Why? Cause I threw something across the room? My mom spoke and said she misses me and she loves me. I replayed those words in my mind. "She misses me". She misses me? What? I don't understand. I'm still here... Then I looked in the new mirror that was inside my room and I didn't see anything. Then it hit me.. I was. I-I was...dead.. I looked back to when those kids beat me up. It all made sense now. Why my parents was ignoring me. Why those kids looked guilty when I came home from the hospital... Why my neighbors kept coming to my door and saying 'I'm sorry for your lost'... I-I couldn't believe it. I was dead... "No!" I yelled out. I didn't want to die! I had a lot more to my life I wanted to do... Now I can't do those things... I cried and screamed. "I can't be dead!" I yelled. Then I saw it. A light. I guess this was the light everyone see's when they die. I screamed at it "No!" "I can't die I don't want to die!" with all the rage and sadness I carried. Then I soon got knocked out. I woke up. "Oh,it was just a dream" I said to myself. I got up and went downstairs to breakfast.
I said "Good Morning!" and they ignored me.. I asked why they were ignoring me and they didn't answer...
February 13,2009 2:00 pm
Have you ever felt like you were invisible? Like no one could see you,and that you were separated from the whole world? Everyone going about there daily routine and it was like no one saw you. Well,I have.